Oh, Boy.

This blog has been the epicenter of depression lately, so it is time to liven up!

Have you seen "RuPaul's Drag Race?" Essentially, it's "America's Next Top Drag Queen." God love 'em. They gays sure like to look pretty.

Above are some of the worst people imaginable. They are the "Real Houswives of Orange County" and I love each and every one of them.  There is nothing more entertaining than over-40 women dressing  like ladies of the evening and getting tanked. Gretchen is only 31, but dated a man in his 60's until his death in September. Unfortunately, they never wed so Gretchen didn't get the windfall she deserved ala Anna Nicole.  The "Real Housewives of New York" are less entertaining, uglier, and more annoying. I don't recommend them.

Post Surgery Update #2

so... i had a really hard time following all the "rules" last time, so i am just going to write this one the way i feel comfortable!

Went to the girl dr./surgeon on Tuesday and everything is healing perfectly... she said i can start increasing activity, lifting heavier things, driving (yeah!  this was good news... i was becoming quite a homebody), basically doing things to get back to normal... she said she had also been doing a lot of thinking about our case and came up with what she thought was our best option... she did preface it though by talking about those commercials for medication that is supposed to clear up nail fungus, but that may have a side effect of causing blindness, etc... you know the kind... but the possible solution she was talking about is the Lupron shots... they put you into early menopause, which is where the bad side effects come in, hot flashes, moodiness (sorry dusty), possible loss of hair, etc... and they are quite expensive... she said that if we decided to try these then we would do them for 3 months and see how i am handling it and then we would do it for 3 more months if everything is going well... after this 6 months she said we will do what is called an HSG test to see if the fibroids have shrunk (that would be the whole reason we would be doing the injections)... she did give me hope in that she said we only need to create a tiny cavern for a baby to take hold and then the baby can handle the rest!  that was great news... however, she did let me know that she didn't want to give me any false hope, and that we were still at high risk, and this may not work... but i know God is bigger than the masses and that His will will be done!  

so we left the dr. with a plan... or at least hoping for a plan... the dr. said if we chose to do the injections then we would start them at my next follow-up in 4 weeks... she said she would go ahead and put them through on the insurance to see if my insurance covers them... so yesterday morning i was sitting here praying that God would just give us peace of mind and let us know if this was the right course of action to take, when the phone rang and it was the insurance company saying that as long as i use their pharmacy they will cover the shots!!! this was huge news, and a gift of answered prayer!  so that is the road we have ahead of us... early menopause, here i come!  if you see me and i start to look a little red around the edges, please give me a piece of paper to make a fan... i hear i need to have one of those with me at all times!

we are hopeful... we are peaceful... and we are excited to see what is going to happen in the next several months... thanks so much for everyones encouragement and prayers during this time in our lives... i cannot express how much it has meant to us... Dan was talking last week about the importance of a church home... i can tell you i have seen that to be so real the last several weeks... everyone has taken such care of dusty and i and the meals were WONDERFUL!... and no repeats!  we also had a visit from my family last week... my mom came down from Canada and got me up and out and about... it was sore for awhile, but i can definitely tell a difference in the last week... it was good to get up and walking around... i am starting to feel like my old self!

i haven't made it back to the hematologist yet, but that will be the next step, to make sure that all the blood counts stayed up after the surgery and recovery... 

thanks again friends!

Post Surgery Update...

So, figured it was time for a post surgery update.  i will try to use more capitals and less ... as those are things that Dusty does not enjoy.  It will be hard, but I will do my best :) 

First for the good news, my hematologist called and said that he wanted me to come in on Wednesday before the surgery to make sure that my hematology levels were high enough for the surgery on Thursday, so I left work early (which meant training had to be done early, this whole process was fairly stressful and I am so thankful it is over) and went to take some tests.  Turned out that my numbers looked good. The iron treatments are kicking in!!! My hema levels went from an 8 to a 12 and my platelets went from a 1 to a 315!!!! This was a huge answer to prayer to know that going through the iron treatments had been worth it, the dr. said that he wanted me to come back after the surgery to make sure my levels all still looked good and we would decide a course of treatment going forward.  At this point I was still hoping that would not be necessary as it was this evil mass that was causing all of the problems an when it came out, the problems would be over with... no such luck... 

So we move on to surgery on Thursday, this was a little nerve wracking, I do not make a patient patient.  They took me back to the OR and the next thing I knew, I was waking up in the recovery room, everything had gone well with the surgery, although I would later find out, it had not gone as planned.  The rest of the day I was much more awake than I thought I would be and had several visitors and stayed awake for the most part.  Sherri made Dusty go home and stayed with me the first night, and what they say is true, you do not go to the hospital to rest!  They come in all the time to take vitals, etc... the morphine I was on was making me fairly nauseous too, so they didn't get me up the first day.  (and we had to put up a fight that took about 2 hours to get some jello!!! It was worth it in the end, I think it was the best jello I have ever had!)  

The next morning the girl dr. came in to visit and give me an update on how the surgery went. This is where it got hard, she let me know that when she pulled out my uterus to remove the mass shown in the ultrasound, that there were actually 3 masses on top of each other on the outside of my uterus and she was able to remove most of them, she also let me know that there were "a lot" of masses inside my uterus and that she could have spent 6-7 hours removing them during the surgery but that there was not guarantee she would be able to get them all because there were so many and that they would for sure continue to come back.  She said as of now Dusty and I would not be able to have children.  This was when I lost it.  This was hard to hear. But my husband and best friend were by my side and were there to comfort me through it... I wouldn't want it any other way... she went on to say that we should not give up and that she would have us visit a fertility dr. (another dr!  just what I wanted!) and they may know of something that she doesn't, possibly going through short term menopause, etc... she just said that right now, there is not enough room in my uterus for the baby to grow because of all the masses. She also stated that I would need to get a hysterectomy soon, as the masses would continue to be a problem.  

So where do we go from here... for right now we wait... we have to wait the full 6 weeks for recovery from this surgery before we visit with the fertility dr. and see what our options are there.  We are both still faithful and know that we are going to be parents some day. God is good and has a purpose for everything, until I started dating Dusty, I never felt the need to give birth to my children, I had always considered adoption. ( I just never knew if it was because I couldn't have children, or if being single was so hard, that He was only giving me one thing to deal with at a time :)) God knows how much we can bear to handle... So, regardless of what the fertility dr. says, we know that adoption is in our future and we both cannot wait to see what is in store!!! 

Thanks to everyone for the prayers and support during this time.  We are home now and recovery is going well. Now we wait to see what God has in store for our future.  Anyone have any information on adoption, please please feel free to pass it along.  This will be a new adventure for us, and we will be sure to keep you updated!  

Ecclesiastes 3:1-8

To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven:
A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted;
A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up;
A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance;
A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;
A time to get, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away;
A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak;
A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace.

You Probably Think I'm A Dem, But I'm Not

Presidential Approval Ratings

The graph above demonstrates that 70% of the population is thrilled it's a new day in America. I assume most believe that whatever comes next can't be any worse than former President Bush. Whether or not the blame placed upon W. was fair is a different discussion, which at this point is a mute point and likely won't result in any changed minds. Dissent is one of the most patriotic duties we have as Americans.  An unquestioned administration is fatal.  In 2003, the press failed the public by either refusing to ask the questions that may have saved over 4,000 lives or demanding better justification to invade Iraq. That can't be denied and will go down in history as the American media's greatest failing of the 21st century.

I did not vote for Barack, but I'm not scared anymore. I am not terrified of President Barack Hussein Obama because he promises transparency with the media, a far cry from his predecessor who was notorious for his combative style with the press.  Thus far, his decisions have remained relatively conservative.  I fervently disagree with him on many issues, but thankful he has been able to unite the Americans who want to be united.  I hope he fulfills his promise to close Gitmo and repeal "Don't Ask, Don't Tell."  Torture and discrimination are unacceptable.

As conservatives, liberals, or moderates, we are all Americans and as Americans we owe our new President the opportunity to lead before we attack.  We need to get behind this President and support him, until he earns our criticism.  We also need to keep President Obama is perspective.  His claims of hope are empty.  We can only have hope in one man, and that man died two millenniums ago.  Having hope in men only makes their failings that much more bitter.  President Obama will fail us because he is human, but until his failings are as devastating as the previous administration, President Obama has my support.

Discuss.

Ugh...

This is going to be one of those random posts with whatever I am thinking at the moment, so be warned.

If Apple did make a toilet, I would buy it. No question.  If they can make superior computers, I can't imagine what innovative creation the iPoop would be.

30 Rock was just renewed for a fourth season! All is right in the world.

This blog has become depressing, yo! You can tell when Dionne posts because she likes to write one run on sentence with "dot, dot, dot's" as she calls them. They are more commonly referred to as an ellipsis. Generally, they are used in place of omitted words or sentences.  Dionne also refuses to capitalize anything.  It is very difficult for someone like me to read text that is knowingly written incorrectly. I still love her and Margo the Mass.  However, Margo will be leaving us on the 29th.

I guess gay really is the new black on The Real World. One homosexual fellow and one bisexual transgender lady who claimed to have a fivesome might be too much, even for me.  Remember when race was the issue?  I'm not a bigot. I have several favorite lesbians. Ellen is my favorite dancing lesbian. Melissa Etheridge is my favorite singing lesbian.  Robin Roberts is my favorite morning television lesbian.  Wanda Sykes is my favorite sassy black lesbian. Lily Tomlin is my favorite lesbian from 9 to 5.  Queen Latifah is my favorite rapping lesbian on Jenny Craig.

The City is certainly no The Hills. Whitney Port should have stayed in California blinking mindlessly and open mouthed at Lauren asking vapid questions to push the story along.  Do you remember the original program The City  circa 1995-1997 on ABC Daytime?  If you don't, in 1995 Loving was restructured to The City after a serial killer murdered 3/4 of the cast. It didn't last long and The View now tapes from the studio left vacant from its cancellation.

Oh, Pelosi. Spending $825 million is not the answer, but your resignation may help.

I think I'm done for this post. I hope you enjoy my view on the world and your feedback is appreciated. 

Surgery Date Set!

Wow... everyone kept asking me after my last iron treatment if i noticed a difference and felt more energetic... really, i did not notice anything different... i did notice some change in my color, but other than that, nothing... this time, i have been able to tell a big difference! i woke up this morning and felt different... i am thinking it is what i used to feel like when i woke up in the morning... didn't feel the need to hit the snooze button even! 

went to the girl dr today to set up the surgery and get any questions answered, etc... the surgery is set for the 29th here in town... dr said i will be in the hospital at least overnight and the next day and then we will see where i am at... she was so nice and answered every question i had... it will have to be abdominal surgery and she let me know that my assumptions were correct... i will be off work 4-6 weeks... said i might feel up to some part time after 3 weeks, but not up to sitting all day until 4 or so... this will be hard for me, i want to make sure that everything is healing properly and yet know that work is going to be on my mind as well... dr said the mass is about the size of a large grapefruit... and i should notice a difference when it is removed... that was good news... on the bad news side, she said she does not think it is my monthly visit that is causing the anemia... she said it might be the mass, but she wasn't sure with the level of anemia that i have... so who knows... i guess we will have to wait for the mass to come out and see what happens then... i do have another appointment with the hematologist on the 27th for blood tests to see how the iron treatments are working, so hopefully we will get some good news then... 

please keep praying that i will be patient for the next couple weeks and NOT think about the surgery... i have a pretty active imagination and i don't want to let it get out of control... 

thanks for all the prayers... we will continue to keep you posted... 

d and d